Wishing death to fashioncore since 2005


The Irrelevant Opinion

Reasons why it’s ok to not care.

This is something of a new area for me to be writing about, but it relates to matters I’ve been pondering for some time now, so I thought I’d encapsulate these ideas into something that allows me talk about something that I do believe exists: ‘The Irrelevant Opinion’. Now, I’m sure many of you would (rightly) say that everyone is entitled to an opinion, and indeed this is true – however, there are also times when others deserve FREEDOM FROM unwanted opinions, times when an opinion (yours or someone else’s) really isn’t necessary. This may sound pretentious without context, so here I’ve tried to explain this belief, using examples that are inspired by things that my friends have gone through, in addition to things I’ve witnessed myself. I’ll try not to ramble.

“You should be ashamed of your tattoos”.

I’m sure many of you have seen the jpegs flying around the internet, with captions such as his:

Q: What will you look like when your old and wrinkly?
A: Awesome’

Indeed, you should be all proud of your tattoos, or whatever you do to express yourself. Sadly, such things are created because such questions are actually asked IRL. Whilst scrolling through my FB newsfeed, I have actually encountered posts by friends with tattoos, expressing that they’ve experienced ‘tutting’ and funny looks/comments from older passers-by, complete strangers. Sadly, wisdom doesn’t always come with age. Be proud of who you are, and remember that their opinion doesn’t count – the first example of ‘The Irrelevant Opinion’. It’s not their body, therefore, not their rules. Tattoos are doing no harm to anyone.

Fact vs Opinion

Some of you will recall someone I shall refer to only as ‘Ms Hatey’ (I shall not type her real name, as she’s had enough attention as it is), a Reality TV graduate who feels the need to express an opinion on everything. Again, everyone is entitled to an opinion yes, BUT, this particular attention-seeker likes to use the phrase ‘Telling it like it is’ – ah, no, let’s just clear that up. What she and people like her are doing, is actually just expressing an OPINION – not something that should be suddenly heralded as a universal truth. Just because one person has a point of view, you are never obligated to believe the same. What ‘Telling it like it is’ actually is, is ‘Telling you my opinion’. Step off that pedestal.

“Full-time mummy is not a job”

I’m sure many of you would have seen this on Facebook too – some women decide to post that ‘Full-time mummy’ in their job description/position box, as obviously, their chosen life direction means a lot to them, and they wish to express it. Or, in a similar vein, some choose to put something more light-hearted, clearly not meant to be serious – I myself once put ‘Cocktail-meister’ in mine, as it sounded much more interesting than my real job at the time. Some people, for whatever reason, choose to take issue with ‘Full-time mummy’ – why? What business is it of anyone elses? It may seem like a strange/almost minor thing to discuss, but it’s become something that crops up far too often, so I’m tired of holding my tongue. I see passive-aggressive statuses/posts from people in groups I’m in/comments from others (none of which are specifically aimed at a specific individual, conveniently for the poster), saying ‘mummy is not a fulltime job’ accompanied by a mini-rant, like they’re the self-appointed Facebook police. Now, I ask you, do you think any of them had the balls to message those they’re actually aiming those comments at? Do you think they’d even be brave enough to say those exact same things face-to-face?. My guess would be NO, and here’s few reasons why:

– They’re hypocritical cowards.
– They’re (perhaps) aware, at some level, at just how mean-spirited that actually is.
– They know full well they’d get their a**es handed back to them by a bigger person for daring to poke their nose in.

How convenient it is to hide behind the comfort of the computer screen.

To be honest, I don’t really know this particular point bugs me so much; I mean it doesn’t affect me personally (a close female friend once said I was like male feminist, maybe it’s that again? I don’t know….). BUT, as I’ve expressed, it really bugs me when people pass judgement on others so easily (life isn’t black and white, people) and generally speaking, I guess part of me has always felt like speaking up for the smaller person/victim. Putting aside the point that you’re not obligated to list your ‘job’ on FB (I can think of more interesting things to ask people/talk about) – I know many who’ve taken a great amount pride, and rightly so, in being a full-time mum. Leave well alone, it’s not your business.

Wow, I spent a lot of time on that one.

‘Random Drunk Guy’

Ah, we all know Random Drunk Guy. Sometimes, it’s Random Drunk People. Nobody (usually) knows who they are or where they’ve come from, but there they are, magically appearing from nowhere, ready to express some stupid unwelcome comment, often whilst moving in the opposite direction as yourself or from a safe distance. They’ll occasionally know exactly where to hit too, as if their inebriation has somehow made them perceptive to sore points. An unwelcome nuisance, but it’s important to remember, no one should care what they think – never allow such people to plant seeds of doubt. Clearly, they have nothing better to do with their time, and have an overwhelming desire for attention and the need to belittle – same principle applies to internet trolls. Neither of these creatures is worth your time. Which brings me to….

‘The Judgmental Keyboard Warrior’

Keyboard Warriors come in all shapes – some are perfectly harmless. Others however, are just made of spite and ignorance. JKW likes to look down his nose at single mothers, because he has apparently never heard of divorce, bereavement or relationships that sadly don’t work. It’s hard to tell whether it’s due to them being devoid of sentiment, or just being stuck in their own supposedly perfect little bubble. JKW makes rash generalisations, and also frowns upon JSA/DLA claimants – seems he’s also never heard of redundancies, recessions or cost-cutting, or debilitating illnesses. JKW often tends to recycle their opinions from others, without taking anytime to research for accuracy, to the detriment of their reliability.
In other areas, JKW is also the person who, regardless of how many times he hits that ‘Dislike’ button on Youtube or makes all the nasty comments he can muster, just cannot seem to grasp the fact that that band he doesn’t like will still just continue to make music for as long as they wish to – why, he asks? Well, it’s simple – his opinion is again, irrelevant. He’ll simple just need to look for attention elsewhere. Or, try doing something more productive, perhaps even positive.

This recently-published article is one good example of what I’m talking about:


I hope this has all made some kind of sense to some of you, maybe you’ve even be able to take something from it – when I first started mentally preparing this piece, I wasn’t sure if/when it would just turn into a very long rant! Never pass judgment without knowing the facts – remember that everyone is facing their own struggles, no matter how big or small.

Instead – well, I will end on something I’ve always believed – always remember to laugh at yourself occasionally; you’re the only one with any right to.


TV gloom

“The sky is falling on our TV screen….”


Above is a cover of a recent TV listings magazine. Upon seeing this, I had a thought – is there too much doom and gloom on TV today? Have we forgotten how to laugh? This much misery can’t be healthy? Would a more light-hearted story arc be too much hassle? No, let’s just colour everything a miserable grey shall we….

Couple these soaps with one particular teen soap, whose characters these days all seemly appear to be either psychos or home wreckers, and endless re-runs of documentaries about people being stopped at customs/on our roads and the like – they make whole series’ on these. Then there’s one unqualified man, constantly lambasting people who should either be seeing a trained counsellor or keeping their problems behind closed doors, for the ‘entertainment’ of the public.

Just recently, the one saving grace of daytime TV (in my opinion), aside from the usual repeats of sitcoms and Come Dine With Me, was Bradley Walsh’s The Chase. Remember when Saturday night TV was THE night for quality entertainment? Now it’s all voting for people’s futures. All the best programmes seem to be reserved for the later hours in the week now – and this doesn’t include the endless stream of pseudo-reality TV we have to put up with.

Still, as long as we have the likes Dr Who and The Big Bang Theory (I’m a geek, sue me) still coming, I guess it’s not all bad. I think Googlebox has the right idea too – laughing at the utter ridiculoussness of it all.

Can we remember how to smile again?

‘Repeats & Spam’

A tribute to Dr Seuss….

‘Repeats & Spam’

Could you watch daytime TV?
Could you watch it in a tree?

Could you, would you, watch the box?
Could you, would you, in just your socks?

I cannot watch this Jeremy Kyle,
I couldn’t watch it for a while!

I couldn’t watch these spoilt brats,
I couldn’t watch these lovers’ spats!

I cannot watch these orange blokes,
I wouldn’t watch this Hollyoaks!

I couldn’t listen to Walsh or Cowell,
I think their music views are foul!

Could you watch post-watershed?
Would you watch it off your head?

Could you, watch this exaggeration?
Would you, under heavy sedation?

I couldn’t watch these silly soaps,
I couldn’t watch these reality dopes!

I cannot watch this Jersey Shore,
I do not know what this is for!

I will not watch these stupid ad’s,
I will not buy into horrid fads!

I do not wish to make a claim,
I think this money grabbing’s lame!

I cannot watch this Spam-I-Am!


Inspired by ‘Green Eggs & Ham’ by Dr Seuss, and the flashing box in the corner that likes to shout/beam these strange things at us. After randomly coming up with a couple of rhymes, I felt compelled to try to write a whole piece. Written for fun only.

Unique artwork supplied by Mark Wilkie, at Gutterwipe. My thanks to Mark for collaborating with me on this. Please check out his blogs and artwork, and contact him for flyer/graphic designs. Mark can also be found on FACEBOOK and TWITTER:


Support Your Scene

Music makes the world go round….

“Without music, life would be a mistake” – Nietzsche.

Such a great quote, don’t you think? So very true. Don’t know what I’d do without music around me – indeed, my life would have been very different without it, especially over the last several years, where I’ve supported various local/underground musical acts in various ways.

I’m sure you’ve all seen various .jpg images floating about on Facebook, other social networks and forums, and whilst this is all well and good, sometimes just simply forwarding something on isn’t enough. A couple ef examples:

I’ve (rather unfortunately) known of people who’d think nothing of saving up large amounts of money and travelling miles out for the next big festival jam-packed full of the Current Big Things, Magazine Favourites amd Old Reliables…yet, won’t spend a few quid to travel to a neighbouring town to catch acts grown closer to home, trying to make a name for themselves – even when their friends are playing, in some cases. Funny that. People forget that without a hometown/local following to help get them started, bands will disappear without tasting any success. Bands on magazine covers all had to start somewhere, but I think it’s a shame that it’s only after reaching that coverage point that some ‘fans’ will start to take an interest. You’d be surprised what talent you could find right on your doorstep.

“Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” – Theodore Roosevelt

(Note: I have the QI Elves on Twitter to thank for that quote – @qikipedia)

I know this is not the attitude people always choose to take, but personally, I’m proud to have become a part of Hertfordshire’s underground/grassroots music scene over the past seven years, in addition to what I’ve contributed elsewhere via my reviews and interviews on Femme Metal, and am always on the lookout for new ways to get involved.

One last one, purely because I couldn’t agree more:

This is the work of artist Rick Vian – simple, but effective. http://rickvian.com/

“We are the music makers, And we are the dreamers of dreams…” – taken from ‘Ode’ by Arthur O’Shaughnessy (and famously quoted by the great Gene Wilder in the film Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory).

Your scene needs you. Whether it’s going to gigs, or even simply clicking a link or watching a video, every little helps.

Sh*t people say

It’s a funny old language isn’t it? Ever stop to think about the things we say? Such as……

“Well wouldn’t you like to know” – Well yes, that’s kinda why we ask…..

“That’s for me to know and you to find out” – Well that’s where you come in, genius.

“Ah, that would be telling” – Yes, that would be telling, THAT’S WHY WE FRIGGING WELL ASK!!! We ask, you tell, that’s how a conversation works….*sigh*

“Believe you me” – Erm, what? Want to say that again with the words the right way round?

“Basic fail” – Ok, someone help me out here – when people say this, are they being ironic? Is it a joke I’m not getting? Has grammar been thrown out the window?

“Bare jokes” – 😦 . At some stage, “bare” suddenly became another word for “more”………yeah.

“At the end of the day” – Slightly OT, but anyway…..Used to use this regularly (it’s a metaphor that works – I occasionally speak in metaphor. You may have noticed.), but now thanks to a certain J.Kyle’s programme, I try (and sometimes fail) to avoid it. They’ve turned it into a cliched term, which bugs me.

Random thoughts – How long is a donkey’s year?  Why exactly is Nora flaming? Who first put Christ on a bike? Just what time do the cows come home?